Frequently, the most important and difficult issue facing parents when divorcing is the living arrangements for their children. In many instances, the parents enter into an agreement that sets forth a custody plan which ideally allows the children frequent and continuing contact with both parents, and affords each parent the opportunity to share the responsibilities and rewards of raising their children.

When parents cannot agree, the court will make the decision. Usually, the court designates one of the parents to be the legal custodian because this allows a degree of certainty and finality in decision making, which benefits the children. Occasionally, joint custody is allowed when the court is convinced that the parties are capable of sharing the decision making process in a manner consistent with the best interest of the children.

In making a custody order, the court follows the principal that custody must be determined on the basis of what is in the best interest of the children. This determination is made on all relevant factors including the following:
1) The love, affection and emotional ties existing between the parents and child;
2) The disposition of the parents to provide the child with food, clothing, medical care, education and other necessary care and the degree to which a parent has been the primary care giver;
3) The importance of continuity in the child's life and the length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory environment;
4) The stability of the family unit of the parents;
5) The mental and physical health of the parents;
6) The home, school, and community record of the child;
7) If the child is twelve or older, the preference of the child, if the child wishes to express a preference;
8) Evidence of physical or emotional abuse to the child, to the other parent or to any other person;
9) The character and behavior of any other person who resides in or frequents the home of a parent and such person's interactions with the child.

In rare cases, the court may award custody to a non-parent if that person shows that substantial harm will result to the child if one or both of the parents is awarded custody.

Keep in mind that divorce may be the most traumatic event in the life of children. How parents deal with issues which arise in divorce will have a lasting effect on the children's mental health. Community mental health professionals specialize in all phases of family counseling. There are trained staff who will provide counseling to couples who are finding it difficult to get along. If you need help, call your local Child and Family Services (Knoxville - 524-7483).

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