By H. Graham Swafford?Jr. | $21.95 | 215 pages | 2014
This book may be ordered from McKendree United Methodist Church, P.O. Box 176, Jasper, TN 37347 or mckendreejasper@bellsouth.net; or at Amazon.com.

In the interest of full disclosure, I have known Graham Swafford a long time. Before law school, I taught at South Pittsburg High School from 1969 to ’71. Graham was a student at SPHS, though mercifully, I never had him in class. I did teach his sister typing — yes, typing — in a summer school class. His mother was on the school board and became sort of a mentor to me.

When Graham found himself in a psychological ditch and couldn’t dig his way out, he got a dog from the pound and learned to fly an airplane. These acts led to an epiphany: write the book of life’s lessons you’ve always wanted to write.

There are 86 lessons in the book. Graham writes most of them, though he has solicited a few lessons from fellow lawyers, kin, judges, ministers and criminals.

Graham repeats two phrases throughout the book to make sure you comprehend his wisdom: (1) I repeat — “In the face of my mother’s warnings concerning … the sin of cigarettes, one can but imagine my response. I could not wait to smoke a cigarette! I repeat — I could not wait!” (2) If you know what I mean — “I never considered myself to be a world class expert on sin; however, I was fairly well-read, if you know what I mean.”

So, if you miss something important, not to worry. “I repeat” will give you a second chance. Or if you have hurried past a statement you think so inane to be unworthy of much thought, “if you know what I mean” will alert you to slow down and think deeply about the lesson being articulated.

This is not your grandfather’s or grandmother’s law book. The law is always hovering over the book’s pages, but the book’s lessons cut such a wide swath across life, it’s suitable reading for anyone.

Graham’s lessons address marital advice, drinking, religion, education, politics, sex, divorce, lying, government, greed, funerals, Penny White, generosity, racism, depression, family, friendship, proper society, et al. Whatever the lesson, there’s at least one nugget — sometimes several — worth extracting and examining.

Graham writes about the stress a lawyer encounters when trying a case, especially if the lawyer gets carried away with himself. Representing a client who had been rear-ended by a speeding truck owned by a “giant, rich, multi-state trucking company,” Graham’s misplaced enthusiasm somehow results in a defense verdict. The book will tell you the whole story, but the lesson, administered by opposing counsel, is: “Pigs get fat; hogs get slaughtered.”

Some of his most salient wisdom is written for young lawyers. For example, “What goes around comes around,” which Graham fleshes out in stark fashion. You’re going to get stabbed in the back. Forgive your backstabber “in a Biblical sense,” but be ready to serve up revenge — cold.

There are four types of clients you don’t want: (1) a self-declared longtime friend of your family you’ve never heard of, (2) a person who tells you at least four times, “I want to tell you the truth,” (3) people (particularly recent converts) who tell you right off the bat how honest they are, and (4) a person on the way to seek advice from a famous, big-city lawyer who decides to give you a chance, especially if the famous, big-city lawyer is dead.

In a display of wisdom, if not genius, Graham periodically heaps praise on his wife — and his secretary — excellent advice for young, old, anyone.

When you practice law in the country, you get to know your fellow lawyers intimately. One of Graham’s longtime fellow lawyers is an excellent lawyer and one of the nicest people in the world. As Graham points out, however, such a person is also someone to be wary of.

You’ll have to read the book to get the full story, but Graham has been enticed by this friend for three decades to provide the friend with legal scoops without ever receiving a reciprocal scoop. Does Graham repeatedly fall for this because his friend is so nice? Or is the real reason that Graham loves to talk? Either way, the lesson is: Keep your mouth shut.

For those of you who know Graham, you would expect him to write a humorous book, and he has — combined with a bevy of “life’s lessons.” My favorite is at the book’s end:

[D]ecisions made by individuals at any level can make a difference that will affect generations …. My sister and I, along with our families, have enjoyed drinking from many wells we did not dig.

Chattanooga lawyer JOHN B. PHILLIPS, partner with Miller & Martin for most of his career, is engaged in employment law consulting and is pursuing a career as an author and freelance writer. His first book, A Time To Be Born: Meditations on the Birth of a Child, will be published soon by Crimson Clover Press.